I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize