PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
