Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
