I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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