I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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