Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
