so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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