His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
