is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
