I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
