Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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