your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize