Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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