The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
