I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
