that's an acceptable place to lick
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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