New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize