It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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