My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I need to stop coming to work sober
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
