Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
