He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize