Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
