Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
