I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
