he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
