I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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