Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
