i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
