I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
