Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
