My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
