I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
