You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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