I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
