I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
