Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I am midnight drunk by noon
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Randomize
