The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize