wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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