Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
