Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Randomize
