i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
