He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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