I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Hippo gnu deer
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
