i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize