New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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