Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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