singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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