you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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