I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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