'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Randomize
