He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize