Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
